Someone turned 31 yesterday.
(Hint – it was me)
Here’s my step by step guide on celebrating this non-milestone birthday.
The Day Before…
…find a cake recipe. Preferably chocolate.
Maybe a recipe that uses some non-traditional cake ingredients.
And was featured in the local newspaper twice in the past few months (recipe here).
Bake said cake so it’s ready to go on the big day.
Then go about your business as usual.
On Your Birthday…
…wake up far too early because you have to work. Think about making yourself a special birthday breakfast, and realize you don’t have enough time. Instead, you have cereal with apples and peanut butter.
Down some green juice for good measure – you aren’t getting any younger, and you know you have that chocolately cake coming up.
Also make a mental note of how you are up before the sun has made it up over the trees to shine in your yard, making your photos look dark. Curse at yourself for not taking the day off work.
Go to work, wearing the most heinous circa 1970’s tie your dad owns. (Did I mention I have to wear a tie to work?)
He may have worn that at my parents wedding.
Eat a stuffed falafel pita you packed for yourself for lunch, because no one at work buys you lunch on your birthday…or remembers to give you a card.
While enjoying said falafel, smile at all the birthday well wishes you have received from your Facebook friends.
Stay at work later than planned, sorting out extra work shifts and doing some important grocery shopping. Like buying more chocolate to decorate your cake.
Make a choco-cherry smoothie to fuel you through said cake decorating.
Melt chocolate. Forgo the double boiler method. That’s for pansies. Direct heat baby! I’m hardcore.
Clumsily transfer hot melted chocolate into a ziploc bag because you don’t own any pastry bags. I’m also a baking MacGyver.
Decorate as you see fit. Or until the cheap ziploc bag breaks and you end up with chocolate all over yourself. Which of course you have to lick off
Repeat with dark chocolate, including the part with the exploding bag. Consume more chocolate. Add raspberries. Photograph.
Think about doing some exercise (Insanity anyone?), but realize that due to your quickly advancing age, you should probably rest up for dinner. So you read blogs and play Farmville instead.
Beautify self, and head out to dinner with your family. Comment on how you haven’t received any birthday cards – even from your own mom. Get told that card has been sitting on the bookshelf all day. Wonder if your eyesight is starting to fail you now that you are in your 30’s. Order a mojito to help forget about it.
Enjoy your dinner out at Browns Social House. Fail to take pictures because a) the lighting was dodgy, b) the food wasn’t really plated that amazingly, and c) because you are drinking said mojito. (For the record, I had the Ocean Wise Halibut – potato crusted with tartar sauce, with almond rice and a salad with dates, corn, feta, soy beans and walnuts. Highly recommended, but ask them to go easy on the dressing – my salad was a wee bit over dressed).
Get your only non-monetary birthday gift from your cousin’s wife.
White truffle infused olive oil from Italy!
Try and come up with creative uses for said gift. Only think of mashed potatoes. Help?
Return home, and enjoy birthday cake with family. Just in case you forgot what it looks like…
Call it a night sometime after Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert have provided you with your nightly laughs.
The Day After…
Blog about said birthday while a ferry whisks you away to Victoria for the weekend to keep this party going! Because really, 31 isn’t that old at all
And hope to hell BC Ferries’ free onboard Wi-Fi holds up while you upload this blog post. Later!
PS – dinner tonight at Veneto! Still undecided on what to order…scallops, crab, veggie tapas? What would you have?