How To Defeat A Mummy

When I was in Victoria for Hallowe’en, I came across a gang of mummies late one night.


Oh, sure, they look cute with those big doe eyes. But come on – they’re mummies! They have to be evil!

I decided to make the ultimate sacrifice, and took one home with me to do away with it. I looked at it as my civic duty really.


Again with the big doe eyes! I’m not falling for it mummy!


It had remained pretty dormant for the past week, until this evening when I heard it stirring. Sometime after dinner. You know, when one might want to eat, say, dessert? I knew it was time.

Time to defeat the mummy.

Did you know mummies have a thick, chocolatey skin? And a layer of oozy, delicious caramel? I was pleasantly surprised. Perhaps this mummy killing stuff wasn’t going to be so hard.


Underneath those layers of delicious defence you’ll find the sour bite of a granny smith apple.


Little did he know, I love me a sour apple. Marianne: 1, mummy: 0.


Things just kept getting worse for the poor little mummy. He lost an eye.


And little by little…

IMG_1372 IMG_1373 

…bite by bite…

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…he was soon in pretty rough shape.


By this point in time, both his eyes had fallen off.


There was nothing they could do, but watch the horror unfold.

IMG_1380 IMG_1387 IMG_1389

You can’t blame him for shedding a tear.


But as time wore on, I realized the mummy’s sweet chocolate and caramel exterior was a brilliant defence mechanism. Eat enough of that, and you’ll soon have one wicked tummy ache.


Not one to quit, I just peeled off the rest, and devoured the rest of his insides.



I made sure to have the last laugh.


Or did I?


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Categories: Cheesy Humour, Chocolate


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5 Comments on “How To Defeat A Mummy”

  1. November 8, 2010 at 8:26 am #

    HOLY CRAP!! THAT THING IS MONSTEROUS (pun intended)! you made me laugh so hard throughout these pictures! omg haha u and me are probably the rare few that would stick food and candy on our face haha! i love how you dislocated him and peeled his face off- creepy but yummy 😉
    these would have been perfect for me to make for halloween. i saw online someone make these into cookies, but they looked kinda boring. ur version is rediculously clever- i just saved the photo, its too pretty not to ❤

    btw i got the pumpkin spiced tea from fairway markets… the one on shelbourne (shelbourne plaza) carried it and the peppermint one too.

    • November 8, 2010 at 8:28 am #

      just realized u bought them from rocky mountain chocolate factory- oops! k i’ll just pretend you made them haha. but in all fairness, its only because generally you make the most amazing professional creations that i just assume hehe ❤

  2. November 8, 2010 at 7:21 pm #

    LOL! Awesome post – gave me a good giggle! the mummy looked delish too… 🙂

  3. November 9, 2010 at 8:53 am #

    LMAO! Great post, Marianne! I sure needed the chuckle on this boring day of work! HAHA


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